Losing a Parent

After a couple of weeks of being hospitalized my mother was transferred to the local Hospice House this past Tuesday where she peacefully passed away at approximately 8:45am, yesterday, Friday, April 4th, 2008. She’ll be laid to rest on Sunday, April 6th. She was a wonderful mother, was loved by many and had what I believe to be a good life.

First, let me say that I can’t say enough good about the Hospice folks. There’s no words to describe the kindness and service they provide in these situations.

It’s an emotional whirlwind here at the moment.

I’m filled with a deep sadness at the loss of my mother but also a keen sense of relief that she’ll no longer have to suffer from the illnesses she’s dealt with for so long.

My wife and I have lost all our parents now.

That’s significant! I can remember as a child sensing that something major had occurred for my parents when they buried the last of their parents, but at that young age I didn’t really understand that passing of the baton.

I’ll let Linda Pastan best express what I’m just beginning to grasp…

THE DEATH OF A PARENT
by Linda Pastan (1985)

Move to the front
of the line
a voice says, and suddenly
there is nobody
left standing between you

and the world, to take
the first blows
on their shoulders.
This is the place in books
where part one ends, and

part two begins,
and there is no part three.
The slate is wiped
not clean but like a canvas
painted over in white

so that a whole new landscape
must be started,
bits of the old
still showing underneath –
those colors sadness lends

to a certain hour of evening.
Now the line of light
at the horizon
is the hinge between earth
and heaven, only visible

a few moments
as the sun drops
its rusted padlock
into place.